When it comes to romantic relationships, I hear over and over again the same phrase: I want to find the right partner/the partner of my dreams, and I’ll live a happy life. Friends or clients, men or women, and even teenagers talk about how much they want to find the man/ woman of their dreams. Every one of us (because I cannot exclude myself) have a mental or actual list of traits we want to find in our ideal partner.

Self-love is not equal to being selfish. You can’t feed others when your pot is empty; you can’t protect others when you don’t wear your armor. As romantic as it may sound, losing yourself to keep someone else in your life does not apply in real life because if you lose yourself trying to please or to help others, you’ll lose them, too.

Regardless of their relationship status, all my clients have the same question: “How do you know you found the right person?” Since this is a recurrent question in my practice, I started writing this article with the hopes it will help you, too.